Peach Sweater Dress

9.19.2018

Hello!

9.10.2018


Hi guys! Can't believe it's been so long since I've posted. July 18th to be exact. A few things have happened since then. As most of you know I was recovering from a Hysteroscopy surgery that I had back June. This surgery was to remove a large fibroid that I had in the cavity of my uterus which was preventing pregnancy and affecting my quality of life. The surgery was a kind of a success. My doctor was able to get 90% of it out, the everyday heavy bleeding has stopped, I don't feel as fatigued and I was able to stop taking all these damn hormones that had my body and skin really messed up. So that's the bright side.

The downside of it all is that I have to get surgery, again. This time a Myomectomy, which I am extremely worried about.  This procedure will have to be done to remove the rest of the fibroid that couldn't be removed vaginally. A small incision will be made on my lower abdomen, it'll be like a c-section. This absolutely terrifies me, but unfortunately it has to be done. 

A few weeks ago after my Hysteroscopy, I went for my follow up and it turned out the 10% of fibroid that was left was still preventing me from getting pregnant. My uterus is pretty much distorted. I could barely hold back my tears. This has been such a struggle and now the fact that I have to go through major surgery really messes me up. 

I've been told that recovery will be tough and I worry about that so much. I am putting all my faith and trust in my God, but I can't help to feel scared. Have any of you gone through this procedure? Please share your experience with me through Instagram. I would love to hear how recovery was for you.

(these photos were taken in late July. hope you guys like!)


GREEN TUBE TOP

7.18.2018

Wearing: Forever 21 tube top (similar tube tops) | Rag & Bone jeans | Bronzallure earrings (similar earrings here) | old Zara sandals

DAY BY DAY

7.17.2018


 These photos were taken on July 3rd, but I am just now getting a chance to post. My anxiety has been through the roof and I just want to feel better already. I hope someday to be able to open up to you guys about everything I have been going through, but I will tell you it hasn't been easy. As of now I am just fighting. Fighting every single day to feel fulfilled, healthy and happy. Though I love the outfits and photos that I post, sometimes I don't post them right away because it reminds me of what I went through that day and I try my best to avoid it and block it so my anxiety doesn't escalate.

I am taking it day by day and praying that some day I will be the Delmy I was once before.
And on that note I hope you are having a beautiful day, full of love and laughter.

XOD


 

LOVE WRAP SLIP DRESS

7.10.2018

Wearing: Free People dress | Zara sandals (old)

BLUE CHAMBRAY DRESS

7.02.2018


It's been 6 days since surgery and I've been having some on and off days. On day 3 I actually felt a bit better, so I started to move around a bit. Well, I should've never done that. The day after I woke up with a lot of pain and heavier bleeding. Today I am still in pain and moving slowly. I am so anxious to feel better so I can clean my house. It's driving me crazy! I also want to enjoy this weather at the beach! But I am trying to stay positive and be grateful for the fact that my surgery went well and that hopefully soon I will start feeling like my old self again. 

I believe these photos were shot a day before my surgery. I was feeling so down, nervous, and so scared. I kept thinking about a nightmare I had the night before, so I wanted to get dolled up and get  out the house, because I didn't know what was going to be ahead of me. But here I am and I am grateful. 

Hope everyone is staying cool in this 3 digit degree weather!

RED BELL DRESS

6.28.2018


This was 2 days before my surgery. I was feeling emotional and crappy and in the spur of the moment I decided to call up my bestie Monique and ask her to meet Gavin and I for lunch. By the way lunch was Delicious. I had a Turkey burger with guac and jalapeƱos (I love spicy food!) with a side of seasoned fries. Mmmmm. 

Anyway,  a lot of times I tend to deal with my feeling on my own and prayer. It's hard sometimes to push myself to go out because of my anxiety. Those that suffer from it, know that it's hard to control it. You can't just snap out of it like some people expect you to. It really is a struggle. So I am glad that I got dolled up and treated myself to a beautiful day, because I needed the fresh air and I needed my friend. Thank you Mo for always listening to me and for making this photo session fun!

@DELMYRIVERAM

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